Use Life Experience and Just Start Writing: Author to Teacher with Dennis Mathew

In this Author to Teacher Episode: Conversations with published authors about writing, teaching, and how we can support our students,  our host Martha speaks with author, singer song writer, and speech pathologist Dennis Mathew. The two discuss Dennis' journey to authorhood, his desire to help students feel loved and welcome at school, and how he encourages children to use their everyday life as inspiration for writing.

You can find Dennis's books Bello the Cello, My WILD School Day,  and How Grizzly Found Gratitude  on his website and Amazon.

If you're a teacher who teaches writing, or really any subject, this is a helpful, insightful, and important listen filled with interesting, real life anecdotes and useable advice you can apply to your classroom today.

Listen along and learn how we can help our students find their passion and voice as writers.

Transcript

Martha (00:00):

Hi. I'm Martha from Primary Paradise Teaching, and this is Author to Teacher, conversations with published authors about writing, teaching, and how we can support our students. During each episode, I'll chat with some amazing authors about their experiences as students, their journeys as writers, and their insights into teaching and learning from their unique perspectives. My hope is that these conversations will give teachers usable insight into how we can inspire our students to find their passion and voice as writers. Let's get started. Hi, and welcome to this episode of Author to Teacher. I am so excited today. I'm going to be talking to Dennis Matthew, who is an author, a singer/songwriter, and an elementary school speech pathologist. So he wears many hats, and I'm very excited to speak with Dennis today. Two of his books that I have personally read before include Bello the Cello and My WILD First Day of School. Hi Dennis, how are you?

Dennis (01:18):

Hey, how's it going?

Martha (01:19):

Thank you so much for joining me.

Dennis (01:21):

Absolutely.

Martha (01:22):

So again, thank you for coming, thank you for joining us on our third Author to Teacher. I'm super excited because I think you have a really unique perspective with all of the things that you do on top of being an author. So let's just start with, can you tell me a little bit about yourself and tell our viewers a little bit about you in case they don't know your work?

Dennis (01:42):

Yeah. So I'm an elementary school speech pathologist going into my 15th year. We'll be starting back up next week, in fact, so there goes summer. But along with that, yes, I'm a children's author and a songwriter/singer as well. So I present to 100s of schools around the country here in the US, and sometimes even overseas to schools around the world I present my books and sing my songs and things like that.

Martha (02:11):

Very cool. Very awesome. So I'm going to get right into it. Again, if you are watching this and you have questions, feel free to add them to the chat or add them as a question, and then we'll address those at the end. So my first question for you, Dennis, is when did you know you wanted to become an author?

Dennis (02:29):

It wasn't big on my radar. I think I always kind of at the back of my head I was just like, it would be nice if I wrote a book someday, but it was just one of those, someday I hope to run a full marathon. One of those crazy dreams, I wonder what would it be like. It would be nice, but it takes a lot of work. Talking about a marathon, I did run a full marathon 2018. I know, right? So it was one of those crazy dreams. Writing a book was along up there on that list, along with running a full marathon. And then what really inspired me to have the crazy idea, was the first school that I worked at, did my student teaching at here in [inaudible 00:03:09], Oklahoma. It was just a magical place, a magical school. I always had this idea of, man, if I could capture the energy, the aura of this building and put it in a children's book, it'd be really awesome.

Dennis (03:18):

And that was back in 2007. Fast forward around 10 years, 2016, 2017 is when I got hit with some life circumstances, and just in an absence of busyness in this empty vacuum, so to speak, when I didn't have anything else to do, I needed something to feel like I was being productive with my time. And to be accurate, I was unemployed at the time, so I could not find work in speech pathology when we had just moved to Boston from Oklahoma. And because I was having a hard time finding work, yet I wanted to kind of make use of my time, I was like, you know what, maybe this is a good time to kind of just take a shot at trying to write that story I had in my mind, and that story was Bello the Cello.

Dennis (04:06):

After I wrote the story though on a word document in my laptop, I didn't know what the next set of steps would be. I did a ton of research to find an independent publisher, find the right illustrators for my first book, and fast forward, I think it's been two and a half years since Bello came out, and it's sold over 10,000 copies now, my journey is unique in that I deal with public schools. Public schools are my main client, so to speak. So right before I hopped on this Instagram live, I was I on a FaceTime call with a librarian in Georgia whose school is wanting to buy Bello for every child in the building, and so that's about over 400 students.

Dennis (04:51):

And so that's the nature of my operation. I kind of have two full-time jobs, I have my daytime school job where I have my own students and my school team that I work with, just like any other educator, but when I'm done with my school job, then my next full-time gig takes over, which is connecting with 100s of educators nationally. And so my journey is unique in that all these books that I'm selling or distributing are directly going from the author to the public schools across the country. So I want to say Bello has reached over 70,000 students since I started this journey some two and a half years ago.

Dennis (05:33):

So that's kind of the nature of my operation, which is very unique, even for... If you talk to any author out there, I have yet to meet an author that kind of takes this approach to writing a book and moving it in massive quantities directly into schools. And the big satisfying point of it all has been just seeing books getting into the hands of children who otherwise would not have the resources, the funds or the connections to get the books that are needed in our classrooms today.

Martha (06:10):

That's so interesting. And I also think, like you said, you have a unique perspective because you are in schools every day working with kids, so your perspective on what kids want to read, you're right there, you're on the pulse of what kids are interested in and what they want to read.

Dennis (06:25):

Yeah, absolutely. And so when I'm asked, what is your mission as an author, I've a two-pronged answer that I always give to students and educators. So to the student, my mission is to write to the underdog in the classroom, because I resonate a lot with that child that is finding it hard to be seen. I connect a lot with that story, because that's my story. So when I write, a lot of my stars in my books are these underdog characters who, everybody is counted out, and then the story is basically about them overcoming whatever odds are in their way. When an educator asks me, what is your mindset or philosophy or mission when you write, it is to kind of make sure that my books are not just these quick reads that are waver thin, but I want them to be like curriculum resources to my educators.

Dennis (07:20):

So I write as a speech pathologist. So I make sure that there's enriching vocabulary in my books, that there are plots that can be taken apart in my book. My books are very well-integrated with social emotional learning skills and growth mindset, things of that nature. So all of those things that we're wanting to talk about in the classroom, I make sure that is well-inserted into my stories. I like to say that my stories have depth. The characters can be analyzed. The plot can be analyzed. And I'm also big on just character development. My newest book that just came out is called How Grizzly Hound Gratitude, and the message of the book basically is, gratitude can help you get through trauma. That's the message I'm trying to drive home with that. So those are the ingredients that I kind of put into the process of making a story or making a book.

Martha (08:14):

That's very cool. And I love that you're pulling in those things that teachers are going to want their kids to learn. So speaking of teachers, I want to think about Dennis as a student. So go back to when you were in school, and I'm curious... I know that your route wasn't directly into writing, but I'm curious if there were any experiences in school, whether they were good or bad, that impacted your desire to become a writer, or your belief that you had the ability to become a writer? So any good, bad, ugly?

Dennis (08:46):

Yeah. So I'm holding My WILD First Day of School, and the reason I wrote this book is because I remember my first day of school, I remember how traumatic it was for me. Now I could look at myself and say I'm an outgoing, type A, I love engaging in conversations, but if you looked at childhood Dennis, I was very much a shy, afraid to come out of his shell, introverted kind of person. And so through that lens though, when you put that kind of a child in a set of new circumstances on the first day, it can be very nerve wracking, anxiety-provoking, if you will. So I remember my first day when my dad dropped me off at school and when he drove off, as a four, five year old, I literally thought I was being abandoned at school and I was not going to see my dad anymore, even though he said, "No, I'm going to come back and pick you up after work," I could not quite process that.

Dennis (09:47):

And so I remember to this day just balling my eyes out on day one. And to overcome those anxieties, I had to go for it, just close my eyes and take risks at making friends, take risks at raising up my hand to answer a question, take risks when it comes to making friendships. The message of My WILD First Day of School is encouraging little ones, hey, go wild within boundaries. Be safe. Be [crosstalk 00:10:12]-

Martha (10:12):

Of course.

Dennis (10:13):

Yeah. So the message of My WILD First Day of School is, don't be afraid to go wild, don't be afraid to really enjoy your first day to the max, to take that risk, and be your own kind of wild as well. And so that right there, my first day I would say inspired writing My First Day of School. And a lot of my books are drawn to using animals as characters, and that's because I'm a big animal lover, I love animals, and also diversity is a big theme that is picked up on in all of my books. I mean, the classic example that most children are drawn to is this picture right here where a sloth is playing basketball with cheetahs. And so a lot of my scenarios in a lot of my books put unlikely characters together in the context, because that's been my life story.

Dennis (11:09):

In most of the contexts that I've been, I've always been the odd one out. And so still by the grace of God, I've found a way to find my place, make my way in, make my inroads and find my song like Bello did in the first book. Those are the kind of worlds I like to create. The worlds that I create in my books, they'll always have characters that have no business being around each other, the message being, can differences of opinions, different viewpoints, different world views, can they coexist, and the answer is yes. So that's a big message that I'm trying to push through my books, because I want our children to understand that, in this classroom that I'm in this year with Ms. Jones or whoever, not everybody's like me, not everybody comes from a background or an environment or a family like me, but I can still learn to love, get along, cooperate, build bridges, engage with my classroom family, even if my friends are from various backgrounds.

Dennis (12:09):

So diversity is big, language enrichment is big in my books, and then like I was saying earlier, social emotional learning, character development. A lot of it is just tapping into my own life stories and using that to articulate these narratives.

Martha (12:26):

So speaking of you're saying you use your own life stories, what advice would you give to a student if you had a student come up to you and say, Mr. Matthew, I want to write a book like you, what should I do? What advice would you give to that student?

Dennis (12:41):

Yeah. I always tell my kids to start right now. Don't put it off. You don't have to wait till next year to start writing. I feel like stories are always happening around us. Even in the present, there are always stories. And to write a story and make it a children's book, it does not have to be this huge aha momentous occasion that you capture into a book, it can be just a trip to the store, a holiday that you got to spend with your family. My encouragement to my students often is, pick any little happening in your world, grab a piece of paper, grab a pencil or a pen, and just start writing. That first draft you create is not going to be perfect. And often I tell my students, Mr. Matthew himself has to often redo the stories that he writes.

Dennis (13:30):

So Bello the Cello had to be rewritten, How Grizzly Found Gratitude, I had to redo three or four times. And so I always encourage children to not, I'll write when I have the perfect story up here in my mind. And I always tell kids it's very unlikely that that day will arrive where you decide to finally write when you have the perfect idea up here. I always tell children to just start now. I always encourage kids to cultivate the habit of journaling. I often journal my feelings, the happenings of my day, I channel that into my everyday journal. Journaling's really good, and the reason I encourage my students to have the habit of journaling, is because if you can consistently journal every day, what happened in a day, or how you felt in a certain day, good or bad, you will stumble upon an idea in your very journaling habit that will be that aha story moment, because that's what has often happened with me.

Dennis (14:34):

I remember my trip to India with my family, so many beautiful things were happening, and I was capturing it in my journal, and as I would journal, ideas would pop up, oh, I wonder if this particular event and how I felt and where I was, how I was able to overcome conflict, could I capture that into a story, into a book, in a mythical place with animals and creatures. So I think ideas for stories that go on to sell a bunch of books or whatever, those miraculous moments just happen when we are doing something that seems to be mundane and boring. That's what I find in my own experience.

Dennis (15:14):

I'll just be journaling like I'm always journaling, and an idea will just jump out of my journal at me and I'll go, oh my gosh, that would make a great story. So I'll often tell students you're not going to capture that perfect idea in your mind, and then start writing. Just start writing now whatever's coming to your mind, feelings, happenings about the people in your life, whatever, and then creativity will take over and the idea for a story will come out of that. So I always tell students, fellow independent, aspiring authors out there, I always tell them, start now, don't wait.

Martha (15:50):

That's such great advice. And I also love what you said... And I actually have touched on this when I spoke with Jarrett Lerner and actually with Jasmine Wright, who I spoke with last week, so you're all saying this, that basically we all have stories in us, life is a story, that's how we communicate. And I also love what you said about how it doesn't have to be this big, fantastic story, because some of the most popular books like Goodnight Moon is kids saying good night to the things in their room, or Knuffle Bunny is about a little girl who loses her stuffed animal at the laundromat. It's literally a 20 minute time period, and these are best-selling books, so that's such great advice.

Dennis (16:28):

The best books invite us to make much of these little moments in our day-to-day errands, happenings that we just take so for granted. Going to the store is the perfect example. I mean, I have a two year old now, and I love how when we are going places, she gets lost in these very little moments that we as adults just kind of blow off. It could be just a butterfly landing on a leaf, a bird flying by, she reacts to them like Santa just showed up. It's like this, "Oh my gosh, a bird." And I think part of us, when we grow up to become adults, as adults, we lose a lot of that awe and wonder and magic, so to speak, that we see in life. We lose it as we grow up. That's just a part of life.

Dennis (17:27):

I always encourage my educator friends, my grown up author friends, don't lose that awe and wonder that little children have, because when you look at the world through the eyes of a child and recapture that awe and wonder, you'll all of a sudden see a story in almost about anything. And I think that's part of how... I mean, just talking about it, I feel joy in me. I think just recapturing that magic, that joy, that awe, that wonder that children so easily look at the world with, when we capture that, you all of a sudden just see a story all around you. You just see multiple stories all around you, and then that's the ease that you tap into to write.

Dennis (18:10):

So it's not that you just sit there and go, how do I come up with a story? Oh, a farm would be nice in my story. Oh yeah, a teddy bear. That seems like a very mechanical process. The best stories written are just organic ones that just come to you. So that's what really good children books, really good children's stories make much of these everyday moments that we take for granted. So I've noticed that.

Martha (18:39):

Yeah. I really agree with that. I also think, and kind of the reason I started this series in the first place, is that like you said, children are so naturally creative and find wonder in everything, and then as teachers, we have to teach them, of course, the rules of writing, but I think a lot of times in doing that, we suck out their creativity, because we're so focused on, do you have capitals at the beginning of your sentence, oh, you have a run-on. A big reason I wanted to start talking to authors, is because I want... As Jasmine said last week, you can get an editor to fix the typos and things like that, but you can't get an editor to embed that creativity. So I guess just trying to figure out what's the best way we can help our students retain that creativity in their writing instead of sucking it out of their writing.

Dennis (19:28):

Yeah. So I think we sacrifice magic to these mechanics. And so I often tell my friends who are wanting to write a book, and students too, just write. Don't put a break in a pause, don't try to get it all right on paper the first time, just let it come out of you organically, and then just like you said, perfectly put, the editor will make sure that the punctuations, the mechanics and all that, the flow and all that is captured after the fact. But let the writing just come out of you naturally. Yeah [inaudible 00:20:05].

Martha (20:05):

I love what you just said. You said a lot of time we replace the magic with mechanics, and that's exactly what I think that we tend to do to students, is we take away their joy about seeing a butterfly land on a leaf, because they're just trying to get the sentence right, and then by the time they're done, we missed that magical moment of their description of the butterfly. My daughter recently said, "Oh, I just saw trash blowing in the wind like a ninja," and I was like, "I have to write that down. That's so good."

Dennis (20:38):

Good. That's very good. Something that my daughter does, is every time she'll see a bug on the floor or whatever, she does that whole, "Oh my gosh, a bug." And she'll bend over and she'll say, "Oh baby bug," and then she'll go, "Dada bug, mama bug, baby bug." Even though there's only one bug sitting right in front of her. And she'll say, "Oh, bug wants to say, hi bug." And she'll just start talking to the bug like the bug can understand what she's saying, like the bug's talking back to her. That's where magic lives, that's where imagination and creativity lives. And I think when as adults we try to be authors, we kind of put all that imagination on the shelf and we try to be very mechanical about, all right, let's write a story with a beginning, middle and end, and that's why you end up with boring products. But if you just let your imagination run wild with no reigns, and then you go back and fix things up, you'll end up with a much better product.

Martha (21:41):

I totally agree. So I'm curious also going back to you as a student and kind of your experience, did you have a favorite teacher in school? Because I know not everyone does, not everybody has that teacher that really inspires them. And if so, can you tell us a little bit about your favorite teacher and why they were a good teacher?

Dennis (21:59):

I had multiple favorite teachers. And I wouldn't say I was an amazing student in grade school. I gave my teachers all a hard time. I would not follow directions well. I was definitely not the kind of kid that sat at their desk and did paper pencil work. I loved teachers that engaged me, captured me with their character, their personality, their relationship-building skills. I especially loved teachers that gave me a lot of tough love, were firm with me, but at the same time, just because they were firm, it didn't mean that they loved me any less. Those are the kind of teachers I really loved. And then absolutely loved my art and music teachers. And I think that's where even at a young age, art and music started speaking to me about, hey dude, there might be an appeal and affinity for music and art within you.

Dennis (22:54):

So fast forward, now I write songs, and I play my guitar, and I present to schools all across the country. So I would say art and music teachers were right up there, some of my favorites, and then always just loved teachers that were firm with their boundaries and expectations and whatnot, but at the same time, those teachers that invested time in having a conversation or joking around, building a relationship with little Dennis. So had multiple favorite teachers, so to speak, but it's definitely the ones that gave me the attention and were receptive to me, because I definitely was a wild kid, no doubt about it, and the teachers that understood that, I really appreciated them. Yeah, absolutely.

Martha (23:37):

Yeah. I mean, I think that's huge, seeing each kid for who they are [inaudible 00:23:42]. Of course you can't have your kids swinging from the light fixture, but there's a nice balance of letting kids be kids and be themselves. And I think teachers now much more than when I was growing up, and probably when you were growing up, are better at letting kids be themselves more, although there's still a lot of work to do. But I'm curious, do you as a person love reading, and... This is a two-part question, do you think it's important to have a strong base in reading to be a good writer, or is that not necessarily something that you see?

Dennis (24:18):

So with me, I can tell you reading's hard for me. I love reading, but I even tell this to students... So when I do my presentations, I always tell kids, you would think that because I'm an author, that writing comes easily to me, that I just absolutely find reading... I enjoy reading, but reading's hard. So when I read something, I've got to read it multiple times. When I write, writing comes very hard to me, the process of it, the thought of it, the thought process. So I share with students that I write because I love stories, but getting the stories out is the hard part for me, but still I have to persist through it. So to answer your question, I don't think it's absolutely essential to have a good foundation in reading or to absolutely love reading. I think it's important to love stories to be an author.

Dennis (25:08):

For me, the place I go to stories the most, are movies. I love movies. And I think it's because I'm primarily a visual learner. I learn and remember something when it's visually demonstrated for me. So a lot of times I'll go to movies for inspiration, but a lot of times it's harder, because reading does not come super easy for me. I can tell you, my wife, who's a lawyer, she can fly through a book, but for me, getting through a chapter may take days, because I want to make sure I read it correctly, highlight it, I've got to read it multiple times. So I feel like reading and writing, just because of the kind of learner that I am, comes hard to me, and I try to work harder at it.

Dennis (25:49):

So to answer your question, I don't think it's absolutely essential to have a great foundation in reading or to enjoy reading even to be a good storyteller. Can your stories live here? Can your stories live... Do you have a wild imagination? That's where it starts, I think. Because I often tell students, man, if I was to bring you into my mind, there's all kinds of planets and galaxies and creatures and storylines living up here. Part of the reason why a book sometimes takes me over a year to be created, is because writing comes hard to me, converting those thoughts into words is hard for me. Now, why do I share that when I make my presentations to students? Because I want authors to come out of those children that find writing and reading hard. Just because you find reading or writing hard, doesn't mean that you don't have an amazing imagination.

Dennis (26:49):

And I don't want those amazing thoughts, those amazing worlds, characters, story plots, wild imaginations that are living in a child's mind who finds reading and writing hard, I don't want those to be lost forever. I want to share my story to inspire those kiddos who find reading and writing hard. I want them to feel like, okay, this dude finds reading and writing hard, but still he sells 1000s of books because he works hard at putting his imagination on paper. If he can do it, I can do it. If he can do it, I want to do it. So yeah, it's absolutely not essential to enjoy reading or have a great foundation in reading. We should work at having those things. We should work at finding joy in reading, we should work at having a good foundation in reading, but I would think the most essential thing is having a wild imagination and enjoying stories. I love stories. I love sharing stories.

Martha (27:47):

I love that. And I think it's so true. And also when you were talking, it just made me think how a lot of my students who struggled in the past with reading and writing, were often the students who would come in on Monday and have the best stories about their weekend. I mean, crazy stories, or they would make up the best stories. I think that's so true. And I've asked that question to every author, and it's so interesting, because personally they've all had different experiences, but they've all said to me that they know authors who did not enjoy reading at all as children, or they don't now, and they ended up basically writing the books they wanted to read.

Dennis (28:27):

That's a great... I'm so glad you said that. Right. Right. So as an author, you looked at the world and said, man, books are out here, but I'm not really enjoying it. I know what kind of a book I would enjoy. Let me go ahead and create that. So yeah, they were trying to create a solution for a problem that they saw in the world, and that's why they became authors. The other thing also I would...

Dennis (28:46):

Two things. I think my joy for reading and my joy for writing is an acquired one. My need for writing books, it came from this need to manifest this world that was existing in my head. So I saw a school where a little cello goes to school and has a tough first day, and then he finds a song, and I was just like, "Man, I wish the world could see this little cello finding his song." So that desire to put this world in my mind out there for the world to see, that desire is what forced me to get comfortable with writing. Because it was just like, Dennis, if you don't get comfortable with writing, this story that you have in your mind is just going to be lost with you.

Martha (29:32):

What a great thing... I'm sorry to interrupt. I just... What a great thing to tell our students, that if you don't share the ideas you have in your head, no one else can enjoy that, no one else can learn from that. I just love that. Okay. Sorry to interrupt.

Dennis (29:46):

No, you're good. You're good. So I was just like, man, if you don't share these worlds, so to speak, they're going to be lost forever with you. What better gift, what better legacy to leave... Even after your story is done, your stories still live on. I don't know, maybe I live to be 80 or 85 or whatever, but even after I'm gone, my legacy could be that I gave the gift of stories that were in my mind. I mean, think of all the authors that we celebrate, Eric Carl being a perfect example. He still lives on. He still lives on through his stories and his artwork. That's what motivates me to write and bring these worlds out to the world, to people, to students via words.

Dennis (30:30):

So the love for reading and writing is an acquired one. That was one thought that I had. The other thought that I had when you were talking about how a lot of your students who struggled with reading and writing were the ones that had the most amazing stories after the weekend, I'm thinking of my kiddos who, if I told them to write a story, they would really struggle with it, but if I told them to draw a picture of that story... I'm thinking of myself because I'm very much a visual learner. I see things in color and bright shapes. Everything becomes visually alive to me first, then I go find the words for it. That's typically the process I go through. I see a little cello named Bello going to school first, then I write the words, Bello the cello was thrilled about his first of school.

Dennis (31:24):

So for my educators who have kiddos who are struggling with reading and writing, when they come after a weekend, if you've given the entire class 15 minutes, and 10 minutes in, or five minutes, in or three minutes in a majority of the class has gotten to writing, but Joey is still sitting there wondering what to write, I would encourage Ms. Jones to ask Joey to draw a picture of his story, then extrapolate the story from that picture. So Johnny, what are you doing in this picture? Oh, that's where I went to the store. Okay. I want you to write, I got to go to the store. I went to the store this weekend. So deriving the words from this visually-illustrated story. I just had that thought as well.

Martha (32:11):

I love that. Because I actually have a writing curriculum that I created, and every single writing lesson, every single one starts with drawings or some sort of visual representation for that exact reason, because even the kids who could just sit down and write, it's always helpful for them to kind of draw and get their ideas... Draw your character, draw the setting, draw the things that are happening, and then from there, it's much easier to look at the picture and then pull some words from that.

Dennis (32:43):

Yep. Yep. Absolutely. I agree.

Martha (32:46):

I think that's super good advice. So let me look at my list of questions. We've actually organically covered a lot of them, so that's pretty cool. Okay. So this is kind of a big question. As an author and a speech pathologist... So you are an educator, you're working with students every day. What do you think is one thing that most teachers are missing in their classroom?

Dennis (33:08):

I would say one reason why I became a speech therapist, or what motivates me and how my role as a speech therapist connects with my role as an author, is I feel like I'm in the business of helping children find their voice. And a lot of times I feel we're so quick to put our agenda for the day, or our agenda for the week, or the year or whatever, the mechanics, if you will, the formula, the cart, putting it in front of the horse. So it's super important I think that past the labels, past the stereotypes, past the baggage that we see attached to children, I think it's super important to make kids feel like Mr. Matthew sees me as a person, aside from whatever I'm working on in his speech therapy room. And it seems so, duh, we all know that, Dennis, but I feel like it's the one thing that we often look over as we're trying to teach kids, because we're so caught up in testing and data and giving information to children, teaching without first building those bridges.

Dennis (34:33):

And so I often say, connection comes before content, and relationship comes before rigor. A lot of times I feel like when I've connected with my students very well... Where do you come from? Tell me a little bit about yourself? How was your day? Tell me a little bit about your family? What do you like to do for fun? I've always noticed that the time that I invest in just getting to know my children, has always then given me big rewards when it comes to actually working on the goals and objectives that I have to work on. A lot of times the cases in speech therapy, the conversation will get going where Johnny's trying to tell me about his weekend, and he's so excited that Mr. Matthew asked him about his weekend, and he's so excited about sharing, and he's got so much language coming out of him, that I get to then go in and fine-tune as he is just narrating his story that he's just amazed by.

Dennis (35:33):

It could be the fact that he got to drive his ATV in the dirt, in his backyard, and he just wants to talk to me about his three-wheeler or ATV or whatever, and as he's talking to me about that, I'm asking him to fix his R, fix his S. Okay. Keep going, Johnny. I'm listening to you. You're doing a great job. Keep talking. I love this story. That has worked for me 10,000 times more or better than me sitting in front of Johnny and asking Johnny, you doing good, Johnny?

Dennis (36:01):

Johnny's like, yep. All right, here we go. Card number one, what is the boy doing? I don't know if speech therapists still do this, but cards and little tool kits and all are very popular with speech therapists, and there's nothing wrong with all of those materials, but man, I heavily rely on an organic conversation with a student. I always have materials and plans and agendas, but I don't always just... If Johnny and I sit across from each other and the conversation just takes off, I almost never interrupt the child to say, okay, we have materials that we need to go through. I almost always just use his conversation to my advantage for us to be working on our vocabulary, our sentence structure, our grammar, our speech sounds.

Dennis (36:47):

So why say all that? I think the mistake that a lot of educators... I don't want to say most or all, but a lot of educators, because we're human, because we're human. We get caught up in John walks through the door, and you all of a sudden start attaching things to that profile. He's got an IEP. He comes from a broken home. He hasn't had sleep last night. Because we put all these labels and attachments onto a child in our mind, we stop seeing them as human beings. And I have to always just teach myself, regardless of what you're working on with a child, first make sure that you are connecting with him or her as a human being, because that investment in relationship always gives me big returns, big rewards, as it relates to my goals and objectives.

Dennis (37:34):

So I would just say, make sure that we're helping children find their voice, make sure that we're helping children realize that they in fact are seen in our rooms. When children leave our rooms at the end of a day, they should feel like, you know what? I came with a heavy burden on my shoulders, but I feel like I got to just leave it all in miss Susan's room or whatever, and I'm leaving the building going back home feeling much rejuvenated with my spirits lifted. And I think that happens when children feel like they are seen in our rooms. But when kiddos walk in, and the minute they walk in they're just given one thing after another, after another as far as a to-do list is concerned, they just feel like, man, I didn't get to unpack what all's going inside me before I could take on more. I don't know if that made sense, but I would just say, just making sure that our children feel like they are seen in our rooms is super important.

Martha (38:38):

I agree. I think it's super important, because it can be easy... The best of teachers I know, you're like, I have to get through this lesson today because we have to move on to the next unit tomorrow. But when you teach lessons and not kids, you're missing the point. And I would much rather maybe be a little bit behind on my unit, and like you said, have my kids feel seen. And it's hard sometimes because you do have pressure, but also I think when it comes to writing, if you know your students and you know about them and build that relationship, when they're struggling with their writing and they don't know what to write about out, you can say, oh, well, you had baseball practice this weekend, why don't you write about that? Or oh, you went to your mom's house this weekend, did you guys do anything? It gives that opportunity, like you said, to connect, and then also it works for the benefit because they can continue to work on their schoolwork.

Dennis (39:35):

And the only way you would know that they had been baseball practice that weekend, is if you know your child. And I think it's super important that we should take the time to get to know our children, because that investment that we put in the child... Most kids who know that their teachers have invested in them in relationship-building, show up wanting to work, wanting to... I want to work hard for Mr. Matthew, because Mr. Matthew takes time to find out about my weekend, find out about my family. He takes time to get to know me. I love coming and working hard for him. You know what I mean? I think that paradigm would really work to our advantage in the classroom.

Martha (40:13):

I totally agree. All right. I have two more questions for you.

Dennis (40:17):

Yeah, you're good.

Martha (40:18):

So the first is, what keeps you going as an author when you want to give up? When maybe you got not some great feedback, or you're stuck in a [inaudible 00:40:29] of trying to write your next book, what keeps you going? What's your inspiration?

Dennis (40:33):

Burnout is real. I mean, I think I'm sitting at over 20,000 books sold in the last two and a half years between all three of my titles, but burnout is real. I mean, there are just times where I feel like, oh my gosh, I feel stretched, I feel tired. In those moments, I always like to just step back and kind of think of those joy points. Because we have plenty of pain points, but I always also think of the very first time I was sitting with my laptop writing the first words of Bello the Cello, did I know that I'd be here 20,000 books later? So I think of the rewards of the past, the work I had to put in to get to here. I think of those aha moments of the past. Those fill me up, but then I always encourage myself saying there might be more moments of joy waiting for you in the future for which you have to put the next foot forward and the next foot forward.

Dennis (41:35):

So for example, today's call where I had that conversation with the librarian and she was like, "We'd love to get 425 copies of Bello the Cello," that all started out because I reached out to a teacher on Instagram and just connected with her, and I said, "Hey, listen, I'll be in your state visiting family for fall break. When I'm there for a few days, I'd love to see if I can come by your school and do a school visit for the students in your building." So it took that initiation. Before long, she said, "Hey, I talked to my principal, I talked to my librarian, they are absolutely excited about it."

Dennis (42:12):

Next thing you know, I've exchanged emails with the librarian and the principal, and I'm FaceTiming the librarian today. That happened today. I didn't know that today I'd be FaceTiming with the librarian yesterday, but yesterday I was feeling burnt. So in those moments of burnout and in those moments of exhaustion, I have to say, Hey, listen, you don't know what joys await you in the future, and so just persist for one more day, persist for one more day. And I think of 1000s of children that get to hold my book. I'm not backed by a major publishing company, I don't have a literary agent, nothing, it's just me, I'm a one-man act, so I just-

Martha (42:57):

I can relate. I can totally relate.

Dennis (42:58):

Yeah. So I just tell myself, look at you, dude. You are a solo act, you're working your butt off, and children who've never met you are waiting for a book in the future. Think of each child, Jose, or Michael, or Jenny or whoever that lives in Alaska or Florida or wherever, children who have never met you in-person, in the future, there's a day where these children are going to be holding a book just like children in the past did. So those moments bring me joy. Those moments where I know children in rural Oklahoma or on the mountain tops of California getting my book in their hands, those moments fill me up and it keeps me going on. And when I say mountain tops of California, I literally drove to a town that's 4,000... Is it meters? I think 4,000 meters above sea level. I think... Yeah, I forget the [inaudible 00:43:51].

Dennis (43:51):

Once, I flew out to California to do an author visit for a school that's literally sitting at the top of a mountain. So remote. So remote. Just drove through the desert for a couple hours to go get books in the hands of children. Those moments bring me a lot of joy. I wonder if another author has driven that far to get to the top of this mountain to get books to this child. So those moments give me joy, and those joy points fill my bucket up and keep me going.

Martha (44:22):

I mean, that's great. That's awesome to just think of the next kid who's going to have your book in their hand. How cool is that? Okay. Well, speaking of your books, I'm going to give you a nice question to reflect on as our last one, which is which of your books, which of the three books you've written so far is your favorite, and maybe tell me why?

Dennis (44:44):

I would say Bello the Cello. I would say Bello the Cello because it's a simple story. I connect with it a lot. I relate to it a lot, because Bello's story is my story. I would say, as a child, I really struggled with finding my gift, my magic, so to speak, what I was good at, and the cello is my favorite instrument. And I think the simplicity of the story is why it sells a lot. In fact, tomorrow I'll be doing an author visit for a nonprofit downtown here in Oklahoma city, bringing a cellist with me, reading the book, and the cellist will be playing. So I would say Bello the Cello is my favorite, just because I connect with Bello a lot.

Martha (45:23):

That's very cool. I hope you take some pictures of that, or someone takes some pictures of that event. I'd love to see it. That's so neat.

Dennis (45:30):

I'm hoping to do so.

Martha (45:32):

Very cool. Well, if you ever want to come to an author in visit in Sweden, come on over. I'll have you at my school. [crosstalk 00:45:40] My principal would be cool with. Yeah, that'd be great. Thank you so much for talking with us tonight, or during the day. Depends where you are. Here, it's night.

Dennis (45:48):

What time it there in Sweden right now?

Martha (45:50):

Almost 11:00 PM.

Dennis (45:52):

Oh wow, it's late. Okay. All right.

Martha (45:54):

It's fine. It's fine. It's before school starts, school starts next week, so there's no sleeping happening. It's fine.

Dennis (46:01):

Got it.

Martha (46:02):

Yeah. But thank you so much for talking to us. It was so great to hear your perspective and your story. And thank you to everybody who tuned in. I'm sure that they benefited from all of your insights. Author to Teacher is going to take a short hiatus because I'm going back to school, but we will be back with more in the future. So thank you again, Dennis, so much. I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to us.

Dennis (46:22):

Thanks so much for having me. I really appreciate you.

Martha (46:25):

Thank you for taking the time to listen to this episode of Primary Paradise Teaching, Author to Teacher. You can find more engaging, effective and simple teaching ideas from Primary Paradise at myprimaryparadise.com, and on Instagram and Facebook at Primary Paradise. Be sure to tune in next time for more engaging conversations related to teaching. Keep learning and teach on.